Fifteen Tweaks and You Will Win Women Over Like A Satyr
If you’re reading this article, you may or may not be familiar with the “pickup artist” movement.
Starting around the year 2003 there was a TON of material appearing online by guys claiming to know secrets to the hearts (and underpants) of women across the world.
Some of this material was GOOD… It hooked me back when I was a teen and in college. Promises of seducing women in 10 minutes, one night stands, sex constantly, you get the picture.
But it was also MISSING a lot of stuff. I knew the formula hadn’t been figured out really by ANY of these guys. Even experts like “Mystery”, Neil Strauss, Carlos Zuma and a lot of guys had good intentions, but the average 9-5 blue collar dude who was just looking for a girlfriend couldn’t wrap their heads around the stuff.
At best they’d get some cool new skills and overcome their fear of women or social anxiety, but at WORST they would become socially awkward dudes spouting off really bad pickup lines to groups of women in bars.
Back in 2008 it was painful to go into clubs and watch guys get shot down by women constantly!
In fact, 90% of seduction books that have been released since then have suffered from fatal flaws
The point here is to turn guys into super attractive versions of themselves so they can
A: get the girl,
B: get the job,
C: feel like a badass.
But there’s a reason a lot of these other books don’t accomplish this goal, which I’ll explain momentarily.
Evolution of Magnetic Attraction
I learned early on that success with women required a different skill set from what was being taught. I decided to create my own system (and keep it to myself) that would conquer this area of my life.
And it worked.
I’ve now I’ve created the Magnetic Attraction and Psychic Seduction series of books to teach this system to new guys, and also reframe a bit of what people typically imagine when they think of attracting women.
And to show how any man can become super attractive.
So, I want to thank you for reading this article. Keep in mind, to fully wrap your mind around this stuff I do suggest constant practice. At the end of all this, I expect you to be able to get girls no matter where you go, at any time of the day, and completely independent of things like your money, looks, or whatever.
You’ll be able to APPROACH women without anxiety and in a way that will amaze your friends.
Finally, you’ll have the power to “seal the deal” all of the time. You’ll be able to get new girlfriends —or just hook up. Either way, you’ll finally feel you have the love area of your life handled.
I hope you’re excited. Let’s get started.
Chapter 1 – The Magnetic Attraction System Primer
The idea behind Magnetic Attraction is to create a personality and behavioral style that draws women toward you. There is a big difference between being pursued by women versus being the guy who chases after women.
Before I mentioned that 90% of books by seduction and dating experts suffer a serious flaw. Well, here it is: they teach guys to CHASE after the ladies. You have to go out and “get” the girl, memorize “openers” and follow a complex system. A few years ago, I released the Dating Masterclass that emphasized NLP and Milton Ericksonian phrasing to get girls into a trance. Yes. This works, but if you’re not quick witted, you’ll fail fast.
This is why some guys become addicted to going out to clubs because it’s kind of like big game hunting! But it doesn’t get you very far.
You see, women are NOT DUMB. They know when a man is “out on the hunt”, and this either works in your favor or it will destroy your chances.
This is why in the late 2000s I used to watch so many guys get shot down in Manila clubs; because after reading “The Mystery Method” or watching that Vh1 show, guys would get all stoked about chasing skirts.
Well, when a woman knows a guy wants something out of her, they do NOT hesitate to reject them HARD. Why? Because a girl reasons: “He’s a man, he can handle it. If he’s going to badly hit on me, he deserves to get verbally bitch-slapped for his stupid behavior.”
Don’t get me wrong, a lot of women want to be hit on. If a guy walks up to a girl with the perfect swagger, perfect demeanor and good style to boot, AND the girl is ready and willing for a man, they will probably hook up.
But such a guy already has to be at the point where he’s really confident, his game is smooth, he looks attractive, and a lot of other variables are handled.
This is why it takes some men YEARS to get good with the ladies. I’ve seen people going out five nights a week for 2 years and still not hook up even once.
There is something seriously wrong with the existing system of attracting women if that’s the case.
The Hottest Guys in the World Are Chased By Women
No matter where you’re at currently, whether you’re already good with the ladies, you’re permanently stuck like the example I mentioned before, or you’re a newbie trying to figure the “attracting women” thing out, you absolutely need to think about how the most desirable men in the world live their lives, and how you can emulate them.
So who are they? Well, forget about the celebrity actors, Pitt, Clooney, etc. These guys might have a lot of charm and were maybe even talented with the ladies before their fame, but having that much social status and money is cheating, so we can’t use them as examples.
I’m talking about guys like your friend Enrique from school who had a new hot girl on his arm every single week.
Even with no money, no celebrity status, nothing—some guys are constantly being HARASSED by beautiful women until it actually gets old and they have to dodge drama and upset exes on a daily basis.
Analyzing their behavior, I realized they have very important mindsets that are difficult to create when you’re thinking along the lines of chasing women. You see, these types of guys are never “trying” to get with women.
On the other hand, they ARE: extremely social, filled with positive energy, always have interesting things to talk about, and just seem to “beam” charisma—people are drawn to them.
The chasers / pursuers, on the other hand, typically have the following attitudes:
- Trying to get laid
- Sizing up women all of the time (“Yeah, I’d fuck her. Her too, and her… ”)
- Worried about how many women they’ve slept with—in other words they’re worried about social approval and if other guys think they’re cool.
- Always wants sex to reinforce sense of value, will rarely turn down hooking up, even if the woman is not very good for them.
- At their core, have low self-esteem or are over compensating for rejections in their lives.
The Catch-22 is that men need to get laid a lot to stop acting insecure like this, but they can’t get laid without first becoming secure with themselves.
Unfortunately, most gurus / teachers in this field ALSO possess such attitudes, but they’ve become extremely good at glossing over it with showmanship, pickup lines, routines and things like that. In fact they’re so good at it they even score once in a while!
Meanwhile, here are some attributes of the “natural”, the guy who just automatically is surrounded by beautiful women:
- Doesn’t see sex as important to defining a man’s masculinity.
- Loves women, thinks they’re beautiful, and is very sexual.
- But does not care about hooking up or not. Puts no importance or value on it.
- Does not size women up constantly—does not look at women as vessels to satisfy his needs.
- Is extremely social.
- Is attuned to people’s energies and feelings. For this reason, can be very sexually forward when the time is right.
- At his core has a strong self-esteem and a sense of identity.
- Doesn’t go for it if it doesn’t feel right – tends to rej ect women more often than not.
Wow, that’s quite a difference. In a random social situation, who do you think—between the two guys —is going to have outstanding success and be very popular among groups of girls?
In fact, let’s say Person A (the first example) is very good looking, and Person B is a bit older, balding, symmetrically challenged. Well the good news is that Person A may get some superficial success, but Person B will be the reigning champion, due to having the proper mindset handled, which is always the most important variables.
Becoming the Second Example: The Key Element
Herein lies a challenge: how do you switch from Person A to Person B?
Well, the first step involves admitting that you have some of those low quality behaviors. This involves also recognizing the fact that being a guy who is constantly “trying” to get laid is not beneficial whatsoever.
The second step hung me up for a while. You see, outer actions actually create inner values. Which is why becoming Magnetically Attractive requires certain systems and challenges to reinforce these ideas. There’s no reason to spend 10 chapters talking about “inner game” because it’s going to be built into the actions you take.
As you proceed with this article series, you only have to keep only ONE thing in mind: the KEY concept is to lower your attachment to the outcome of any situation with ANY woman.
This one bit of advice is all you need. As soon as you approach a woman (or a group of women) with any type of intention to get laid; or any desire to get something out of them (approval, sex, attention, whatever) then CAPTAIN, WE’RE GOING OFF COURSE! EMERGENCY!
Proper attitudes will always be: curiosity, a desire for friends, seeking opportunities (of any kind), and seeking to CHEER women up (make them smile, make them happy, or make them feel good about themselves).
Notice the difference? These attitudes are primarily about GIVING to women, whereas traditional pickup artists only care about TAKING from women.
EXERCISE: Print This Page
If you’re reading this from your cellphone, use your operating system’s screen capture tool and print out this page as a jpeg. Then, keep it with you. That’s how important this attitude is. It’s easy when reading programs like this to gloss over certain parts, or THINK you’ve made a mental note when you really haven’t. However, this is the one concept you can’t forget.
Chapter 2 – Outer Attractive Qualities and Peacocking
Before we start going out and attracting women into our lives, let’s cover some of the essentials regarding presentational abilities.
With Magnetic Attraction I do believe you can go out as kind of a slob and still be popular. I don’t want you to think that it’s all about looks. HOWEVER: looks always give you an edge. If you’re not presentational you MAY get judged before you even open your mouth, and your chances will be thrown out the window.
It’s also a good idea to look and feel your best as you transform yourself.
Step one is grooming. This is a no-brainer. You don’t want to go out socializing if you have a four-day old neck-beard.
- Buy an electric nosehair trimmer, and j am that sucker into your nostrils. Nose hair is one of those things you just can’t afford to forget about.
- Take care of your teeth with a metal scraper. Plaque also equals bad breath, and a host of other problems, so buy a dental grade picker.
- Wax unwanted hair. For instance, if you have a unibrow, you might want to get rid of it. Also, if you’re a hairy guy like me, you may find your stomach / chest hair slowly transforms into your pubic hair into a long and terrible mass. I would highly suggest to get rid of where that hair links, or else you will look like a manimal.
- Hair: if you have a huge bald spot; unless you really know how to rock it, consider what you’d look like going “gangsta” a little bit and just shaving it all off. If you have a full set of hair, make sure you’re properly texturing it. Talk to your favorite gay hairdresser for styling tips.
- Facial hair: Facial hair is great if you did decide to shave off your hair / bald spot. A nice goatee can be very masculine / attractive. But it can often depend on facial features, too—so I’d talk to a stylist.
- I’m not a fashion expert, but understand that you can create a cool presentation for yourself IF your clothes fit and they make sense.
- There’s some styles that give people specific feelings. For instance, leather bomber jackets almost always reflect a rebellious nature.
- You can also look fashionable and urban with a good peacoat (for winter months) and some designer jeans.
- Maybe you’re a cowboy, then don’t underestimate a denim jacket and boots, or something similar.
- So find the motif that works for YOU. If you’re not a cowboy, why fake it?
This stuff will make a big impact on people’s initial thoughts about you. But don’t obsess too much about it because you can also attract a lot of girls by wearing a stained Mountain Dew t-shirt and ripped jeans if your personality is magnetic and charming. (Don’t do this, though. I’m just saying).
There’s some great diets out there for people who want to make their skin more youthful with less signs of acne, wrinkles, grease, and so forth. I’d recommend the ZONE diet which focuses on lots of nuts, legumes, whole foods, water or organic juice and avoids fried-anything, or anything with too much sugar.
This diet will also give you a lot more energy, increase your mood and maybe prevent future cancer. So, big pluses!
Color: I recommend 15-20 minutes of sun daily to add some color to your face, especially if you’re a pale keyboard jockey. I don’t suggest longer than this much time as it can become damaging.
If you’re obese or really scrawny, well don’t expect these problems to go away overnight. But it’s never too late to get started doing what everybody always recommends: joining a gym There’s millions of ebooks out there about fitness, for all different body types, so I’ll differ to them about this subject. But I will give some basic facts: very scrawny guys need to greatly increase the amount of food they’re eating + lots of protein, and focus on lifting. Really fat dudes on the other hand, have to eat less calories and focus on a LOT of cardio. Get after it.
This is self-explanatory, just buy some kind of good cologne or hell even a lot of Axe Bodyspray is better than nothing.
So a lot of dating coaches back in the early 2000s came up with the idea of peacocking. We all know about peacock theory; which is that a peacock finds its mate by puffing out big, colorful feathers. Well this is still a good strategy in the dating world.
The idea is to wear accessories and things that give a woman an excuse to talk to you. Since we’re doing Magnetic Game, this is CRUCIAL because an otherwise bashful woman might notice an accessory and use that to say “hello”. This will double your interactions with women.
To understand peacock theory, I included a pic from some magazine I found. I have no idea who this is, so shout out to whoever took this photo originally (please don’t sue me):
OK, so this dude looks super smug, but he’s still a good example. As you can see he’s wearing a nice shirt and accessorizing with red shades. If you’re not accustomed to, start wearing fashionable belts and maybe high powered necklaces.
So all you really have to do is wear something that stands out enough like this that women can come up to you and say “Ooh, what is this?”
Body Language / Posture
Ok, this could be another book in itself, but I’ll tell you right now that if your body language and posture isn’t corrected you’re going to be DEAD in the water. First impressions count, and if you are communicating any type of NEEDINESS as a result of leaning in too much, or INSECURITY from hunching—it’s over before it could start!
My personal advice is to find somebody who served in the Army or the Marine Corp (if you’re from the states). You’ll notice these guys have good posture (and sometimes they even overdo it…) because they’re trained how to do it and it’s a requirement.
You need to pull your shoulders back, with your chest out slightly, but you can’t overdo it, either. Another trick is to place your back against a flat surface and compress your abdomen to try and eliminate the hole created along the arch of your back.
There’s no escaping the fact you HAVE to get videotaped for this one. One nervous tick of mine is that I may move my lips when I am thinking “outloud” (I’m always thinkin’), and people used to believe I was a crazy person who mumbled to himself before I corrected it a few years back.
That being said, what unconscious habits are YOU doing that you don’t even know about? Are you a nose-picker? An eye-shifter? A hand rubber? Figure it out and then begin consciously ELIMINATING it!
A bad nervous tick could really mess up your chances!
So, now you’re hopefully handling the “outer” and this might feel like a huge mission in itself. It’s OK. But you need to get this handled before you can move on to the next parts. In fact, I’d say just stop reading this for now and get to work on this stuff. After you’ve made an attempt at all these sections, we can talk again.
Chapter 3 – Being Friendly
The key to Magnetic Game is about being able to approach large amounts of people, projecting out your personality, providing great feelings, and then immediately recognizing when women feel attracted and having the tools to capitalize on that.
Here’s the point where things change from other dating / attraction / seduction books. This is about the point that most writers would start talking about the need to begin getting stuff out of women.
This may include getting phone numbers, getting dates, getting hook-ups, or just getting enough approaches under your belt out during nightclub excursions. Some writers even stress the importance of “getting” rejections to build callouses.
This is crazy to me because I don’t get “rejected” anymore, and you won’t either.
In this article, your goal is NOT to “get” any of these things. We want women to voluntarily GIVE them away, without you having to do much effort. We do this by “working rooms”, being magnetically attractive, and allowing them to come to US.
Another bit of advice you may hear that I feel uncertain about is “warm ups”; which is slowly learning social behavior by asking women for the time, and then gradually moving into personal conversation, or perhaps conducting a routine of some kind—like a scripted set of behaviors, that you practice over and over until you get better at approaching ladies.
Going into this years ago, this advice posed the biggest learning curve of my life. Women immediately “knew” I was conducting a routine, using pre-scripted lines, or just asking for their time as a cheap, unconfident excuse to talk to them. So, I don’t think you should do this, either. Side note: a friend of mine created a system of conversational hypnosis, the type of which lulled women into a sense of rapture, then lust. I’ve seen it work horrendously well but you must have the skill at extemporaneous delivery. Without this skill, conversational hypnosis will make you look stupid.
Another strange piece of advice that I don’t really agree with is the concept of engaging women sexually and aggressively (such as during the daytime). “Just man up and do it” is something I’d hear tossed around a lot. There’s videos out there of some guys who can approach a woman at a K Mart and proposition her within 15 minutes.
Hats off to those guys who have this extraordinary skill, but if you’re just coming out of a dry spell and you’re looking for a girlfriend, give me a break. Unless you’re a very special personality type, I don’t think you should try anything so drastic.
Instead, let’s just aim to be friendly to people, which is the first step in the Magnetic Attraction process.
Mission Objectives: Make as many people as possible feel good about themselves.
You’ll find you won’t feel much anxiety about talking to people if your goal is just to offer a smile and move onward.
- On the way to work, smile and offer slight nods to people as you walk by.
- Memorize some jokes. Quick ones that only take a minute. Such as: “What’s brown and sticky?” “eww” “A stick, what did you think I meant?”. If you get some laughter, perfect— now move on.
- Toss jokes and good times to every depressed barista or cashier you happen to come across. Male or female.
- Wave at people who you’re stuck in traffic next to.
- Compliment anyone who feels they need a compliment. If somebody’s wearing a new tie, make sure they feel good about picking it out. If a girl feels self-conscious about herself, imagine how she could benefit if you told her that she had an incredible smile?
So what you’re going to do is start doing this all of the time. Really, I think you need to spend about a week practicing this and you shouldn’t skip any days.
At this point in many men’s seduction type books, you’ll hear somebody talking about the problem with “approach anxiety”. What you’re going to discover doing these exercises is that anxiety doesn’t really happen if your intention is simply to make somebody feel good.
You see, anxiety is typically the result of trying to achieve a desired outcome, and feeling the pressure of the performance (as thus, performance anxiety).
What you MAY experience through this exercise is occasional self conscious thoughts or shyness.
This is quite natural, especially if you’re not a social person by nature and you have to push yourself out of your shell.
But understand there’s no obligation or stated outcome as a result of performing these exercises. There’s no demographic, and no intention to “pickup” girls or try to achieve some outcome of X amount of phone numbers.
After you’ve spent some considerable time doing this, I would suggest to move on to the next chapter:
Chapter 4 – Flirting
Now that you’re quite used to saying “hello” and cheering people up as you go through your day, it’s time to begin shifting focus from random people and more toward women you are attracted to.
Flirting is the important stepping stone from “cheering people up” into “communicating sexually with women”.
It’s an Extremely Subtle Adjustment
The first big point about flirting is that the difference between being very friendly and talking to people, and expressing sexual interest, is tiny. It’s like when you’re driving a car, moving your hands by a couple of millimeters can send you in an entirely different direction.
Really, it’s based on a couple of variables.
- Interest: you feel attracted to the woman.
- Interest reciprocated: she feels interested or curious in return.
- Normal communication ensues with a new “tone” of attraction.
The key to flirting is thus physically FEELING interest in the woman, and being emotionally cognizant to when she feels interest back.
This is the key to becoming a flawless natural: understanding when there is mutual interest, and then immediately capitalizing on it:
So that’s what we are going to work on recognizing for this next mission.
Mission Objectives: Create Interest Among Several Women
The next thing you need to do is make it a point that the people you interact with on a daily basis are women that you find attractive.
Now this doesn’t mean you are going to run around pursuing every woman you meet and begging at their feet. But what you WILL be doing is seeking interactions with the ladies with normal, casual, friendly communication, such as:
“What’s the story with that?”
“Hi, what’s up?”
“How’s your day / evening going?”
“Have a long day ahead?”
“You look great today, have a good one!”
A Solid Opener is one that arouses intrigue. The simplest way is to state an observation or opinion about her that will excite her emotions.
Here are examples:
Hmm you’ll be pissed if I tell you what I saw. But don’t worry. You’re a winner
I don’t know about you. You must know something they don’t
Another great topic is something controversial, pertaining to travel or some secret . The key is any subject that arouses emption
Personally I love using Snyder’s Occasion Location Opener Method.
It’s simple. Merely make a comment on the occasion at hand or the location. You’ll never be at a loss for words.
What’s boring in your life these days
stuck on a desert island. If you can bring just one book.
If you can write a note to your younger self in two words. What would it be
Throughout the discussion, physically move her from place to place
This is a trick that makes her feel like she’s known you a whole longer than she really has. Touch the small of her back and guide her around. Touch her palms and shoulders.
Alpha Language Will Attract Her
Don’t lean in. That’s needy.Lean back and make her lean in. Better yet, wave her to approach closer. I get women so deep this way. And as you talk, slow down your rate of speech while glancing sensually at her lips. That flirtation style worked for me since the years of Ateneo High School.
Make sure you relax your jaw and shoulder.Hold your head high.Limit your hand motions. Speak slowly. PAUSE.
After she asks you a question, pause for a second like James Bond. Then reply. This is very sexy.
Here are a few more Openers just in case you run out of ideas.
Ask her favors. Lots of favors.
Getting her to do stuff is very alpha. She will value you more. If you’re thirsty, ask her to get a glass of water. Tell her to fix your tie.
Get Her Criteria
Ask her, ” what’s important to you about… ” in rapid succession. This will give you ammo to discuss what is really important to her. You will glow like a rockstar.
Make her Sell Herself To You
Losers tend to sell themselves to women by bragging. You sell yourself short and appear needy. Instead, have her qualify herself to you.
Here’s a Qualification Example-
You strike me as a creative person. Tell me, what do you think makes you different – special. From everyone out there
I get the sense that you are passionate in life. I like that. Many of my ASSOCIATES are. What are you passionate about
(pull her closer: giver her a confused look)
I bet you you have a nice smile. Am I right?
If you had to sum it up, what would your three positive dominant traits be
I get this feeling that you’re XXX. Don’t know if that’s true but if so I appreciate it coz… Yyy
You’ll never run out of things to say with my favorite formulas that get her talking all night. Just say these:
You look like you might need some great conversation. Got a secret you want to share with me? I’ll tell you mine after.
What’s the story behind that
I’m guessing that you xxx. Am I right? Tell me more
Or you can simply say
What Brings You Here “(to establish commonality)***
What did you do before coming here. (then pick a topic to Expound on)
As you may have guessed, the point is just small talk. You’re not trying to get anything out of them and you’re not trying to seduce them. The point is to make minimal interactions to get over any social shyness you may have, and to also make you feel more comfortable approaching women.
You see, when a woman (especially an attractive one) is approached by a guy, the first thing she thinks is “What does this dude want?” – but you’re bypassing this by NOT wanting anything – just talking. This is MUCH more powerful than you think because you’re giving girls the chance to be attracted to YOU.
On your day-to-day endeavors, focus on making non-committed small talk with about 10 different women. Then, just move onward.
Easy enough, right? When this is done, we will move into the second part of this mission.
Step 2: Turn Interactions to Flirting
For the second half of this mission, you’re now going to turn your daily interactions into flirting.
“But how?” you may ask – “What do I do? What’s the perfect line or piece of banter that I can produce to flirt with a girl?”
Well, I used to get stuck on this reasoning also. Fortunately, to turn an interaction into flirting is easier than you think; it’s a subtle, mental process.
- If you see a woman, imagine how it is you are attracted to her. Fantasize about her. This will actually help you.
- Ensure you feel that sense of your own attraction as you engage her in small talk.
- Don’t worry about what you’re saying, focus more on how you feel. You can talk about literally anything. It doesn’t matter.
- Use your eyes. Make solid eye contact, and drift your gaze down toward her mouth a little bit as you talk.
- Ensure that you speak slowly, and playfully. Imagine you are teasing your little sister.
- Flirting will happen naturally from this point.
By expressing your interest like this NON VERBALLY and subtly, you are “forcing” the attraction. You’re being charming, and communicating your flirtation under the radar. This gives her the opportunity to express her sense of attraction back to you (if she’s feeling it).
Next, it’s very important to understand the signs that she now feels attracted. You can’t miss these indicators or you’ll blow it. It SHOULD be fairly obvious when a woman is showing interest in you. There’s a lot of subtle yet clear signs that, unfortunately, a lot of guys miss.
Here’s are killer sentences that creates very deep conversations:
You Know what this is so random but tell you what. I’ll tell you three things no one knows about me. You do the same. But has to be interesting
You can also move to Occupations and Passions to link achievement emotions to you
I’m curious what you passionate about. What do you love to do. What keeps you busy? ( get past present future ) What got you into it.( Get criteria Give their words back ) what do you love about it. Where do you see yourself with that years from Now
What do you do to relax? Then use hypnosis to get subject to relive experience
The Childhood Regression Method
Past Regression is a key hypnotic technique to link positive emotions to you. Did you know by asking her about wonderful memories from childhood, she starts to think of you fondly?
Where did you come from ?
Who where your heroes?
Where did you play at?
Touch Her! Keep Touching Her
Tell her You got something on your nose … Your chin. Then touch her.
Observation Question Compliment
If you’re at a loss for words, the OQC helps jump start the discussion.
You have athlete writen all over you, what’s your sport? Well you carry yoirself with discipline and elegance.
You look like a martial artist. Do you fight ? Coz..
The Rapport Game
Tell her, “Let’s play the question game. You ask one and I’ll answer it sincerely The. I ask one neither of us can ask the same one”
Signs She’s Interested
- Is she paying attention to your words?
- Does she maintain eye contact with YOU and no one else?
- Does she lean IN while she talks to you?
- Does she touch your arm?
- Does her face light up when you talk to her?
Now, the important point here is by expressing your attraction non-verbally, and without being direct, she will sense a subtle shift in energy and this is what will either spark her attraction to you, or it won’t. But don’t become outward, forward or obvious in your intent unless it’s clear that she’s into you. In other words, don’t compliment her, lean in too much, touch her or any other outward sign UNTIL she demonstrates them to you FIRST.
This is how Magnetic Game works. Your goal is to be charming, interested in her (without explicitly demonstrating it), and being non-attached (small talk, not caring about the outcome, not trying to “close” her) but being VERY aware of HER signals. As soon as she expresses her interest back to you, you can gradually escalate your own interest.
What you’re doing is you’re filtering out girls who are NOT interested in you. You see, most guys spend 90% of their effort trying to impress, charm or win the 40 or 50% of girls who don’t really care about them It makes no sense.
You see, when you focus your effort only on the girls who are already explicitly interested in you, then you will achieve close to 100% “success” rates, and you can painlessly move beyond the girls who are not interested in you, and would likely reject you if you tried to persistently hit on them
Never waste time again trying to impress the women who are not attracted to you. Instead, become the master of understanding their signals, and only place your effort where it counts.
Chapter 5 – Meeting Lots of Women
By now, you’ve learned some basics about becoming Magnetically Attractive. It’s really about perfecting your outer appearance, making non-committed small talk, mastering your ability to flirt, and then paying attention to their signs of interest in you.
But this doesn’t mean you’re going to have huge amounts of beautiful, available women come into your life. These skills alone will, at best, get you talking to more people and becoming more social.
To take the leap into becoming a kind of seduction expert you hear about, then you have to apply these concepts to settings where there are lots of women available that you can talk to.
For this, it’s all about location.
Bars and Nightclubs
The obvious choice is bars and nightclubs. On any given weekend, you’ll see a lot of guys swarming around clubs and hitting on women. So how can we light up a club WITHOUT having the “getting / pursuing” attitude?
Given that we are Magnetic Attraction specialists, we have the ability to actually outperform every other guy in nightclubs who are trying to vie for female attention. Multiple times after going into a club I’ve had other guys get me aside and ask “How is what you’re doing possible? All these women keep coming up to you!”
“Dude, you’re like a MAGNET!” one guy once told me. (And that’s how I ended up with the nickname “Magnetic”).
Follow these steps:
- Enter the club
- Find the first group of mixed guys and girls, and ask “Are you all having a good night?”
- As they’re responding, quickly say “Awesome, I’ll catch up with you all later” and move on.
- Go toward the bar, order a drink, and clink glasses with the first person on your left. A big smile, a warm greeting, and then move on.
- Go to the balcony with your glass; find the next group of people and tell them a joke. As they’re responding to it, explain; “I’ll catch up with you all later. See you.”
- Avoid directly “hitting on” ANY woman you meet. Again, small talk, bright positive energy, move onward. Non-attachment. And, of course, flirting where possible.
- Direct everybody in the group with eye contact. Don’t exclude anybody.
At this point, here’s what women are seeing:
Some dude comes up to us, maybe he’s hitting on us? I don’t know…
He seems really attractive and confident, and good energy. I don’t think he wants anything from us…
He’s pretty friendly, has a lot of confidence, and that s a cool necklace he s wearing.
And now he’s wandering. Oh, darn, I wanted to find out about who he was. Now he’s gone, and he’s talking to some more people. He must be really popular.
What will happen next?
Like clockwork, women will start trying to get your attention; that is women you’ve met from inside other groups will come up to you at the bar (or anywhere) and be like “Hey, do you remember me?”
Or groups will try to include you in their circle, or invite you for after-party events.
It’s that simple. It’s not rocket science. And yet, there’s supposed to be such a big, drawn out process involved.
So the beauty of this system is that you’re never compromising your integrity. You don’t have to be a dancing monkey or vie for the approval of some woman in a bar you don’t know. You’re just allowing them to come to you.
- Approach large amounts of people. If possible, meet and say “hello” to almost everybody in the venue.
- Move around always. Don’t linger until you’re actually engaged with a woman who’s interested in you.
- If what you’re after is sex, then be open to the idea of taking a woman back with you, or to go back to her place. The more indifferent / laid back you are about this idea, the easier she’ll feel about it. More about this in the next chapter.
Places Other Than Bars
I do enjoy the nighttime venues the best for the ability to operate like this. But for some people, the daytime is the best.
It’s harder in the day because you can’t move from person to person as swiftly. But, you can continue casual, non-pursuit approaches effectively in certain places. For instance; classes, clubs, or daytime mixers like charity events or art shows.
It’s the same idea as before. If you see a girl with a cute dog, comment on the dog, show your positive energy or non-verbally express your interest, and then move on. When you see her again, she’ll be thrilled.
With these ideas firmly in place, you can really accomplish a lot. But, it’s very important, however, to know what to do NEXT—after a girl approaches and is interested in you.
Everything I’ve taught so far is only 50%. The next part of the interaction is understanding how to close, escalate, and make the woman yours.
Chapter 6 – Closing
So, you’re in a club, and a girl remembered you and came up to you. You’re now in a whole new ballpark, my friend. If you’re a bit rusty with women, the art of communicating with them and most importantly taking things to the next level is a big topic.
There’s a lot of information out there about stages of an interaction (attraction, comfort, seduction). It’s mostly bunk.
The truth about sex is that if what you WANT is a one-night stand; a lot of women are up for it if you A: don’t make a big deal about it, and B: have the proper logistics in place. You don’t really need to go through some weird system to get a woman’s favor. Most of the time, they’ve already decided within minutes of meeting you if they want to sleep with you or not.
So, before you go into a club, you need to understand what it IS you want.
Do you want one night stands? Do you want a steady girlfriend? Do you want a non-steady girlfriend? Do you just want to expand your social circle?
Because if you want a one night stand, the first thing you need to do is ensure your living conditions are appropriate for that. Women will rarely be stoked about going to a house that you share with five people in a tiny bedroom that’s messy, and then navigating stares from weird roommates after the deed is finished.
But if you’re with a girl you’re actually dating, then it’s possible she’ll be cool hanging out with you just about anywhere. But seeking a relationship is a lot different from seeking a one night stand.
For one night stands, what you really need is a nice crisp little apartment in a convenient part of town close to the nightlife, and preferably by yourself.
Or, you could decide you want to go back to HER place. Sometimes you can accomplish this by just casually mentioning “OK, are we ready to come back to your place?”, and presto.
Nonetheless, whatever your goal is, you have to know how to navigate the situation so you can cooly —and cleanly—take things to the next level, because it’s typically not only what you want, but what she wants
My opinion about sex is that even if you ultimately want a long-term girlfriend, you really do need to sleep with her first, and you need to do it before some other man comes along and beats you to it.
Here’s a walkthrough for anybody who is curious about how to take an interaction from the initial meeting and into the bedroom. In this case, I will use the bar or nightclub as my example. Let’s assume you’ve just “walked the room”, met a ton of people, and you’re waiting for the girls to be magnetized back to you.
- First of all, if a woman is going out of her way to talk to you, rest assured she’s interested in you.
- If a woman is interested in you, she wants to spend more time with you, which means you can easily move to a quieter part of the bar or club.
- You have to keep the same non-committed, relaxed attitude as when you first met her.
- Conversation doesn’t have to be complex.
- Match her interest, so if she’s touching your arm as she talks, you can start to touch her, too.
- The opportunity to be alone with her is a great chance to escalate. Gauge the situation, if she’s sending you a lot of signals, you can usually pull her in to make out with you.
- In addition, if she’s pulling her face close to yours, you MUST kiss her at that point. If you miss these opportunities, you could blow it.
- The idea of hooking up must be as NONCHALANT as possible. If you give it any kind of emotional investment, you could blow it.
- The interest has to be mutual or less: if you start showing more interest in her than she’s showing toward you, then you could (once again) blow it.
- Never turn down the opportunity to escalate the more that she flirts with you. The sooner you’re making out with a girl, the better. Going for that kiss separates a lover from a friend zone victim
Moving from a bar to a bedroom does require a kind of plausible deniability to take place. It’s not so easy to tell a woman “Come back to my place and let’s screw”, but it is a bit more comfortable to say “Come back to my place and we’ll have a drink.”
Allowing Her to Invite Herself
In the true Magnetic Attraction way, it’s sometimes best to allow the lady to be the first to indirectly ask to come back to your place. Remember, this whole articleinvolves being VERY socially aware, and noticing when she wants you to take her home is part of that skillset.
There are two specific questions a woman will ask you that indicates that she wants you to go home with her, or for you to take her home.
“What are you doing later?” or “What are you doing tonight?”
At which point the appropriate response is always: “Just hanging out at my place, wanna join me?” If you’re feeling cocky, you could say “hanging out at your place”.
She will likely say “sure”, and then it’s on. Fairly simple.
These are the nuts-and-bolts of “closing” the deal when you meet a woman. But like anything it takes practice and a lot of social adjustment to bring yourself to this level. However, I believe by not worrying about canned routines or other synthetic techniques, it will come much more smoothly for you.
But at some point, if I’m getting to know her well, I like to turn the conversation sexual.
Turning the conversation sexual is one of the most important things you can do with women.
While she may be attracted to you already, talking explicitly about sex brings up the idea of sex in her mind.
Talking about sex triggers sexual feelings in her as she visualizes situations that she’s talking about.
One way to get from deep rapport to sexual talk is to tell a story. I have a story I tell about my parents almost catching me and my first girlfriend having sex in the basement of our house.
It’s good because it transitions from something very rapport-based (my parents) to something very sexual (having sex with my girlfriend in a strange place).
Chapter 7 – Common Hurdles
Now I’ll go into the two most common problems I hear guys exclaim as they work on this area of their lives. In future books in this series, I’ll go into some of the other sticking points.
HURDLE 1 – I Run Out of Things to Say
One of the most common problems that guys face as they start going out and meeting women is that even after they’re attracting them—they don’t know what to say when they meet them.
So, they blank out, or have problems keeping the conversation going.
This is especially common among shy guys who are going beyond what they’re used to.
Here’s what to do about this:
- Practice Improv. Improv experts use random word generating tools (can find ‘em online) to think of creative stories to associate to words. Freestylers may also use these tools to create original rhymes from out of thin air. This is a powerful skillset that will aid you socially.
- Always focus attention back on HER, not you. Ask questions, nod your head, and LISTEN!
- Anytime there’s a dreaded awkward pause coming up, use whatever you were talking about moments before to craft into an observation, and then a question. You can talk about stories from your life, society, pop culture. Then, ask her what she thinks.
- But you have to be quick on your feet.
- Remember great conversational skills really involve what you DON’T say. Never brag about yourself. Never put others down, and NEVER negative gossip.
HURDLE 2 – Approach Anxiety
The Magnetic Attraction style should not come with any approach anxiety, or at least only very small amounts of it. The reason is because you are effectively meeting as many people as you can within a short amount of time, and allowing the girls to do all the work to find you and talk to you again.
So, there’s no pressure when you approach a group of bar or club patrons to conjure some flawless performance to isolate the woman, distract her friends, and disappear with her like a magician’s stage act.
You’ll find that most “approach anxiety” is really just performance anxiety. We place too many expectations on ourselves, and try TOO hard to get some random chick who we don’t even know.
Damn straight this behavior would make a person nervous.
By approaching in the Magnetic Attraction style, this anxiety will never occur.
Now, some people may experience slight approach anxiety as a result of simply asking “hey, what’s up?” to big groups of people. Just remember that you’re only being social. No ulterior motives. You have permission to move onward if you don’t feel right.
If you’re just not feeling in a social mood, well in this case you really do have to make some effort to improve your vibe. I suggest “warming up” by talking to people on the street or in line outside.
HURDLE 3 – Last Minute Resistance
“Sorry, but this doesn’t feel right.”
I really think that “last minute resistance” is evidence that the woman just doesn’t feel comfortable around you enough yet. Sometimes, however, it’s because of religious or other moral hang-ups.
The best thing to do is take it easy. Relax. Don’t push it.
If you really want to prevent LMR, then what you should do is focus a lot more on the foreplay. Pet her, caress her, kiss her neck. Do this until she can’t think straight anymore and is consumed by desire. It won’t be hard to move things to the next level from this point.
What do you mean by “it’s wrong to pursue women”?
I mean it’s wrong to go into a club, venue, anywhere, and try to push your presence into a girl’s life. Magnetic Attraction is about being charming, sniffing out when a girl is attracted, and then capitalizing on that. Pickup artists / pursuers try to push, push, push, and many women feel annoyed by this behavior. Traditional “pursuing” behavior is not a very efficient system
How long do I stay in set with a group in a club?
When you approach a group of people, come in with a glass raised, clink glasses—say hello to everybody—then leave. Your focus should be on making a very strong impression, and then getting out of there. You can always come back later, in fact that’s the whole point.
What if no girls are coming up to me?
Walk around the room again and wave “hello” to people you introduced yourself to earlier.
Remember if your impressions were strong—because you had a cool appearance, good body language, and you were confident—they WILL remember you and usually want you to join their groups.
What if she has a jealous boyfriend?
Who cares? Move to another girl. Remember YOU have abundance. You can always walk away and find someone better.
What to do if she loses interest?
She’ll only lose interest if you show too much of your own interest too early. Or, if she gets bored.
You’re only boring, however, if you’re not attractive to her. But, if your approaches were all confident, this won’t be a problem
How to get good at this?
Go out, a lot. 4-5 nights a week.
How many people should I converse with in a club of like 200 people?
I’d try to talk to at least 100 people in that club.
How do I ask for her phone number?
If you don’t think you’re going to go home with her, at least get her digits. This one’s easy. Make sure you’ve talked to her for at least 30 minutes or so (this way she’ll remember you), then be like “I gotta go, let’s bug each other on text message”. And presto.
Phone numbers are sometimes not that valuable. You’re better off hooking up that night, or waiting until you see her again at the same location next week. After the alcohol wears off the next day, most ladies throw out their phone numbers or delete their new contacts.