I used to worry that I wasn’t the girl for you but now I know that you’re not the guy for me.
You’re never going to be the one who shows up when I’m in pain at 3 am in the morning to hold my hand and spoon me with love and affection. You’re not going to be the one who goes out of his way to help me or stay with me until I fall asleep. You’re not going to hold me in your arms until you make sure everything is alright again. You only know how to be absent. You only know how to make people feel all alone.
You’re never going to be the one who calms my storms or reassures me that you’re not like the rest. You’re never going to be the person who makes me feel like I’m enough because you’ll always be looking for something else, curious about someone else because you’ll always think you can do better. You’ll never think I’m the best.
You’re never going to be my prince charming, you’re never going to be the person that’s genuinely proud of me. You’ll never be the guy who stands tall in front of a crowd and says she’s mine because you’re a coward and you don’t want to be linked to anyone. You want everything to be on your terms, at your convenience, you always want to be the one who cares less.
You’ll never be the one who cares more or the one who stays. You’ll never be the one who loves unconditionally or gives without thinking twice about it. You’ll always be the one who’s scared, the one who keeps making excuses. You’ll always be the one who keeps running away.
You’re never going to be my hero. The one who saves the day. The one chooses me over anyone and anything. The one who puts me first. The one who understand that loving me may not be easy but it will be worth it and the one who knows that life will never be perfect but it’s better when I’m with him.
You’re never going to be the one who makes loving me look easy. You’ll never be the one who just knew from the moment he met me that he can’t let me go. You’ll never be the one who tries harder or fights for me when things get rough. You’ll always be the one to complain, the one to let go, the one to put yourself first, you’ll always be selfish with your heart and with me.
You’re never going to be the one who captures my heart or protect it. You’ll always be the one who steps on it unaware of how much it hurts.
Rania Naim is a poet and author of the new book All The Words I Should Have Said, available here.