“I don’t get it. Why is my boss heading up my organization when there are much smarter people under him?’ a seminar participant asked recently. It was obvious to all of us that she was frustrated.

Since I didn’t know her boss, I couldn’t really answer, but if her boss is like many managers I’ve known, the answer is simple — self-confidence.

“Do you remember that girl in high school who really wasn’t that pretty, or even nice, but she was still popular?” I asked. “She had something about her that attracted others to her — self-confidence.”

“Instead of getting angry, maybe it’s time for you to take a page out of your boss’ book. After all, he must be doing something right,” I suggested.

I explained that someone who is confident is very attractive. And each of us has the power be self-confident. In fact, studies reveal that most of us secretly think we’re better than everyone else. We rate ourselves as more dependable, smarter, friendlier, harder-working, less-prejudiced, and even better in the sack than other people. (more…)

Life is filled with transitions:

- from one career to a different one

- from one position to a new one

- from one relationship to the next one

- from one way of life to a new one

- from the old to the new (more…)

From the moment of birth, babies are learning how to communicate, building on their innate ability to communicate to their mother through crying. Thereafter, throughout life, a person’s development and progress relies on communication of one form or another, either communicating to or receiving communication from others. Communication skills are a very important asset to help any person on the road to success.

Being able to communicate is essential to all creatures in nature, and the human species is no different in that respect. Of course, we regard human communication as far more complex and sophisticated than that of other species. There are many avenues and means of communication that we, as a species, use. However, for the purpose of this article we will focus on interpersonal communication skills, as it is those skills that may be critical to success in many fields of endeavour. (more…)

Opportunity only knocks once, the saying goes. It’s a terrible thought, designed to scare you into trying something that may or may not be right for you. A better use of the metaphor is to say that opportunity knocks many times, but we choose not to answer the door for various reasons, both good and bad. On the other hand, why wait for anything good to come knocking, when you can simply invite it over?

How do you do this? There are many specific techniques you can use to generate more opportunities and “good luck” in your life. One of the easiest ones is to simply start recognizing and being grateful for the opportunities you already have. Do this until your mind is trained to do it automatically, and you will start to have more opportunities and good luck in your life. Why does this work?
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Plato stated that every message should have a structure like an animal (head, body and feet), so too must our arguments follow an understandable pattern. A confused mind says “no.” If the audience can’t follow your facts or the substance of your message, then their brains will not accept your message. That’s because there is no clear message to accept.

At one time or another, you have probably been in a classroom where the teacher has completely lost you. You had no idea where the topic was going or where it had been. When this happens, your mind stalls and the learning process stops. Confusion is a state of mind that creates tension. We all hate to be confused. When, as persuaders, we create this mental confusion in our audience, we are shooting ourselves in the foot. Most uneducated “rookie persuaders” follow Harry Truman’s advice: “If you can’t convince ‘em, confuse ‘em.” This manual aims to help you avoid making such a mistake in your persuasive efforts.

Before we jump into the meat of this topic, remember as you prepare your persuasive message that you want to focus on one defined issue. Keep in mind that you are not there to persuade your audience on ten different points. Stay focused and steer clear of sensitive issues that aren’t integral to your original agenda. In other words, don’t inadvertently offend your audience on one issue when your focus is on another. The structure of your persuasive message should follow the pattern discussed below.
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Brainpower algorithms is my own term for the rules that we develop to help us think more efficiently. There are examples from every area of life. Salesmen more effectively sell once they are trained to smile and match the pace of the buyer’s speech. Real estate investors can more easily analyze a property if they have a mental checklist that they run through. Writers think in terms of headlines that “grab” the reader by using words like “top secret.”

Universal Brainpower Algorithms

Some of the most useful rules of life are simple questions that cut through the clutter in our minds and point to the most essential aspects of things. Consider the question “What would (insert hero here) do?” Asking this is a powerful way to quickly resolve ethical issues. A Christian facing an ethical problem, for example, can usually quickly imagine what Jesus would do. This process bypasses the rationalizing that often passes as rationality, and lets our powerful unconscious mind show us the way. Here are some other questions that can be useful. (more…)

Do you have a contract with God?

The secret to living your life’s dreams isn’t really all that mysterious. God will work miracles for you if you are willing to reprogram your mind to think a little differently. Contrary to popular belief, life does not require a fierce struggle. It might take some sacrifices, yes, but nothing that you can’t handle. Yes, it also takes a certain amount of risks but again, nothing that you can’t deal with.

As incredible as it may seem, we don’t have to do anything extraordinary except believe that God/the universe will provide us with the tools that we need to achieve our dreams. He will bring about circumstances, people, events at just the right time for things to unfold in the most natural way possible. The critical ingredient is having a contract with God and believing that you are right where you’re supposed to be and that bigger things are in store for you. (more…)

In aviation, there is a term that designates who, at any given moment, is responsible for flying an aircraft. That person can be the captain, it can be the first officer, the co-pilot, or even a student pilot, just learning to fly. But it is one and exactly one individual in any aircraft at any given time. This term is “Pilot In Command.” It is in fact a formally defined phrase under federal aviation regulations, because it is so critical to the safe operation of an aircraft. When one pilot wishes for another pilot to take over as Pilot In Command, he or she must engage in a brief, but very formal and serious conversation that goes something like this:

Current Pilot In Command states, “Your airplane?” New Pilot In Command says, “I’ve got the airplane.” (more…)

There is one guaranteed formula for failure, and that is to try to please everyone.

There comes a time in every person’s life when he must learn to say no to many good ideas. In fact, the more an individual grows, the more opportunities he will have to say no to. Becoming focused is the key to results. Perhaps no other virtue is so overlooked as a key to growth and success. The temptation is always to do a little bit of everything.

Right Comes First Our higher responsibility is always to do the right things. These come first. We should do the things that we’re called to do, the things that are right, with excellence, first - before we start diversifying into other areas. (more…)

Words empower life and vibrate intensity and love into the world; or hate. What you say comes back to you ten fold whether you believe it or not.

There are those who would say this is bunk and they don’t believe it, but the fact is whether you believe it or not, your words vibrate out into the universe and echo back to you in ways you never dreamed. When you say bad things, they come back and bite you. They reveal the depths of who you are in your heart.

When you say good things, they also come back, but they bless you. They also reveal who you are in your heart. (more…)